I can’t continue like this

I desperately need healing. As you know, I hear voices. One of the main voices that I hear is of someone with whom I was best friends with. It’s always the same loop that plays over and over again. She is talking negatively about me. The other voices try to tell her good things about me, but she always comes back with something negative. No matter how many positive things that the other voices say, she is never pleased. It’s really hard to let someone go when you hear their voice all the time and you are reliving disappointment over and over again.

I feel like I’m doing everything that I can to be whole and well. I’m involved in a recovery group, I go to counseling, and I’m taking my medicine for the voices. At the end of the day, none of it seems to matter. There are so many positive voices that say good things and encouraging things, but her voice is mostly always negative. I don’t know if that’s my subconscious or what, but I just can’t keep hearing this day in and day out. I had to leave the 21 days of prayer because I thought that I saw her there. I just don’t want this anymore. I don’t know why this is happening to me. Why do I hear her voice?

I don’t know what to do about it. It seems as if I’m stuck with it right now. That’s my prayer for the 21 days. I want her voice to go away. I want to be whole again and have this wound healed. I’m believing for it. God says the he binds up the brokenhearted and that is my scripture that I’m going to cling to for the next 21 days. Thank you for reading. Till next time.

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